I Am Not Who I Was Before

by Swallowed by the Sun

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released 02 July 2013

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Track Name: Broken Memories
I close my eyes but you never seem to disappear
You haunt my dreams
You haunt my dreams
Like a needles’ sting in a phantom limb you’re still here
You’re poison to me
You’re poison to me

These broken memories like songs that I hear
Spin their sweet lies and then disappear

I told myself I’d never drink that wine again
But here’s to old friends
Here’s to old friends
Stumbling out of time I know how this night will end
Still I pretend
Still I pretend

These broken memories like songs that I hear
Spin their sweet lies and then disappear
These broken memories like songs that I hear
Spin their sweet lies and then disappear
Track Name: Black Widow
Your life is littered with bones
Of the folks you used to know
Cause you prefer to be alone, don’t you
You’d invite them all inside
Just so you could suck ’em dry
What a beautiful web you weave

Twisting
Caught in your web
And I can’t escape

You sit and you spin
Choosing your friends
And intricate arrangement that only serves your ends
You offer up advice
Before they think twice
Your smooth manipulation’s got them clamped down in your vice

Twisting
Caught in your web
And I can’t escape
No I can’t escape

Give and take, give and take
But I’ve given it all
Still you want, still you want
Just a little bit more, just a little bit more
Easy come, easy go
And it’s barely a sting
Always looking for who tomorrow will bring
Who tomorrow will...

Twisting
Caught in your web
And I can’t escape
No I can’t escape
Track Name: I Am Not Who I Was Before
I remember Sunday nights
When life was lived in black and white
With all the answers at my beck and call
Then came the days of North and South
And all the hurt spilled from my mouth
Was just a taste of what it meant to fall

Once the arrogance of youth is gone
Everything falls away ’til all that’s left is the core
I know I am not who I was before

I went off to see the world
You settled down and had a girl
I guess that we were never meant to be
Now we live on two different coasts
Guess that what I miss the most
Is the feeling of endless opportunity

Once the vibrancy of youth is gone
Everything falls away ’til all that’s left is the core
I know I am not who I was before

Pressure comes and pressure goes
And only broken seeds will grow
I can’t say I’ve welcomed all the pain
Heartache found me anyway
Still it finds me to this day
Like a plow-blade breaking up this hard terrain

Once the innocence of youth is gone
Everything falls away ’til all that’s left is the core
I know I am not who I was before
Track Name: Reflection
You were born with sunshine on your face
Rays of light to lead your days
The world spread out before you
Your heart was full your head was clear
You never doubted, never feared
The world spread out before you

But now you’re old, you’re tired
You stare into the glass
At a stranger looking back
You see the light, the life
That used to burn so bright
Now dying in your eyes

You set your jaw, walked out the door
Your heart was set on distant shores
The world spread out before you
The trip was longer than you thought it’d be
You spent your life half lost at sea
The world moved on without you

And now you’re old, you’re tired
You stare into the glass
At a stranger looking back
You see the light, the life
That used to burn so bright
Now dying in your eyes

How
Did it get to this
How
Did I get to this

Now I’m old, I’m tired
I stare into the glass
At a stranger looking back
I see the light, the life
That used to burn so bright
Now dying in my eyes
Track Name: Looking for A Home
Dreams of my youth
Are haunting, haunting me
Ghosts I can’t undo
Wander freely through the corridors of my mind
Through the hollows of my heart

They’re looking, looking for a home
Cause they never, never found a life with me
They’re looking, looking for a home
Cause they never found a life with me

Echoes of your love
Dance around my empty room
Their footsteps still fall on deaf ears
Cause they never found purchase
On the steep stone face of my bitter broken heart

They’re looking, looking for a home
Cause they never, never found a life with me
They’re looking, looking for a home
Cause they never found a life with me

I know I pushed you away
But nothing good ever stays
I’ve always been a runaway

Looking for a home
I’m still looking, looking for a home
Will I ever, ever find a home
I’m still looking, looking for a home